


The Chains of Fate

by toomanyunfinishedfics



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Also lots of spoilers, Also some of the confidants have speaking parts here but only for like one scene each, Also this fic is unrelated to the other two fics in my NG+ series, Alternate Universe - Kurusu Akira Has A Palace, Figured I'd point that out to avoid confusion, M/M, New Game Plus, Not sure if I should tag them but I'll add the tags in later if anything, Probably not as angsty as you'd expect with that tag, So I'll tag, Spoilers, This is more of a "Ryuji interacts with shadow versions of all the confidants, Will I ever stop taking advantage of NG+ to ruin Akira's life?, With ridiculous amounts of tarot-related information, and helps Akira overcome everything that's holding him back" fic, fic though it's different from the other NG+ fic I'm working on, survey says no, too since it's a
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-04
Updated: 2018-09-04
Packaged: 2019-06-17 23:55:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 19,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15472911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toomanyunfinishedfics/pseuds/toomanyunfinishedfics
Summary: “Name?”“Akira Kurusu.”“Place?”“All of Tokyo.”“Keyword?”“... Prison.”Akira smiled humorlessly as he passed Ryuji’s phone back to the stunned blond.“... Like I thought. It’s a hit.”





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Another NG+-ish fic because my brain likes ruining Akira's life apparently, though this time it’s less “NG+ times infinity” and more “NG+ where Akira has a palace because I said so” (Also I admittedly didn’t max out a lot of the confidants so I apologize that I ended up skimming over most of them… I didn’t feel confident enough to try writing all the characters OTL) I also don’t know anything about tarot cards so I got my information on the meanings from labyrinthos[dot]co and thesecretofthetarot[dot]com, hopefully they’re at least somewhat accurate;;
> 
> Thanks to Canti and Music for reading this fic over for me and encouraging me to post it! You two are the best <3
> 
> Also, just to note: This fic is completely unrelated to my other NG+ fics! Sorry for any confusion!;; I just love NG+ stuff lmao

“... This is….”

Ryuji swallowed thickly as he glanced around, his body tense as he took in his surroundings.

Entering a palace (though he’d only ever entered two other palaces in his life) usually filled him with a combination of adrenaline, giddy excitement, and an almost overwhelming sense of righteousness--after all, he was there to change the heart of crappy adults who were getting away with hurting other people.

This, however, was a bit different.

After all, this wasn’t the palace of some cruel adult taking advantage of society.

It was the palace of a friend who was suffering--both by society’s hand, and his own.

* * *

It had been a crazy two months since the day Ryuji Sakamoto first met Akira Kurusu: putting aside the matter of just how quickly the two of them clicked when they met early that morning on the way to school, like they were old friends reuniting after not seeing each other for years, there was also the whole “stumbling into his crazy asshole gym teacher’s palace later that same day and working together with a talking cat to awaken his very own Persona" thing.

Ryuji was sure Akira would think he was crazy when he confided in him about it, but the so-called delinquent (who was anything but that--it was obvious just from being around the guy for five minutes, which made everyone's treatment of him that much more infuriating) merely gave him an encouraging smile and promised that he believed him.

Had anyone else said those same words, Ryuji might have thought they were mocking him or humoring him, but Akira… there was something about him that Ryuji just inherently trusted. If Akira said he believed him, then he believed him, plain and simple.

Unfortunately it didn't seem like just bringing someone to the Metaverse was enough to help them get their own Persona (Ryuji thought it was a shame, it would've been pretty cool to fight side by side with him), but again Akira gave Ryuji that small, patient smile of his and told him not to worry about it--he could still back Ryuji up with the model gun that Ryuji brought with him.

(Ryuji wished he'd been paying more attention, wished he'd noticed the sadness in Akira's eyes, wished he'd questioned why Akira knew that the model gun would work like a real gun or why he even knew Ryuji had it to begin with--)

It was around when they discovered Kaneshiro’s palace--their team having grown to include their classmate, Ann Takamaki, and a former victim of one of their previous targets, Yusuke Kitagawa, both of which unlocked their own Personas while Akira remained the only one without one--that he noticed a small yet odd detail, one that he was surprised he hadn't picked up on sooner.

Whenever someone would open the Meta-Nav, Akira would flinch, playing off gripping his head by running a hand through his hair or fixing his glasses.

It was such a small thing, one that no one else seemed to notice, and part of Ryuji wondered if he was just imagining things--but his gut was telling him that something wasn't right, and his gut hadn't led him wrong yet.

Which is why he, in a stubborn show of determination, invited himself up to Akira's room above the LeBlanc cafe and plopped himself down on Akira's couch.

“Can I help you?” Akira questioned with a hint of amusement, his eyes not moving from the lockpick he was crafting at his desk.

(Morgana called him a natural, Ryuji just wondered where the hell he learned to make all the crazy shit he'd bring for them on their palace runs--it had to have taken months to pick up those kinds of skills, at least.)

“Yeah, as a matter of fact, you can.”

Akira's hands paused briefly in their work as he glanced over at Ryuji, and for a moment Ryuji was unnerved by the odd expression on his friend's face.

When Akira turned his gaze back down to his desk, Ryuji couldn't stop himself from letting out a breath that he hadn't even realized he'd been holding.

_… The hell was that all about?_

“Well?” Akira questioned, breaking the silence, and Ryuji was confused for a moment before remembering why he was here in the first place.

“Oh, uh….” Now that he was actually here, with Akira waiting for him to voice his concerns, he began to second-guess himself--maybe he'd been overthinking things after all? Maybe it was just a coincidence? Maybe--

“You're worried,” Akira said, startling Ryuji, and now Akira was turning his head to look at him again, this time with a concerned expression and _shit_ he hadn't come here to make Akira worry about him, he just had to come up with something to say--

“I just… had something on my mind. You're a smart guy, figured you'd have a better chance helping me sort it out than if I started trying to think about it myself.”

Akira turned in his seat, signaling that Ryuji had his undivided attention now, which Ryuji took as a sign to continue.

(He was really glad that Morgana was nowhere to be found--he had a feeling that the cat wouldn’t let him hear the end of it if he started spilling his guts and talking about his worries in front of him.)

“So, uh… let's say I have this friend.”

“Sure, let's pretend you have friends,” Akira quipped, prompting a huff from Ryuji that belied his amused smile.

“Oh shut up, you know what I mean. I got this friend, and I think something’s wrong with ‘em, but I don't know if I'm just overthinking things or not--and no smart-alec remarks about me never thinking to begin with or whatever.”

Akira held his hands up in a gesture of peace. “I wouldn't dream of it.”

“Good.” Ryuji frowned. “So… what do you think I should do? Should I approach ‘em about it, or…?”

“Well, it depends on the person, but generally I'd say honesty is the best policy.” Again, an odd expression crossed Akira's face, and Ryuji had to bite his tongue to keep from pointing it out. “Worst case scenario, you really were overthinking things but you're showing that you care enough to worry in the first place, and best case scenario you're right and you can help your friend fix whatever’s wrong with them.”

“That… makes sense, I guess,” Ryuji murmured, dropping his gaze in thought before looking back up in determination. “Akira, I think--"

“You think something's wrong with me,” Akira finished, smiling as Ryuji winced.

“When you say it like that, it don't sound too great.”

“It's alright,” Akira responded, his smile dimming slightly even as his expression remained understanding. “I've… had a feeling, for a little while now, that something was wrong.”

Ryuji sat up straighter, his expression determined once more. “Whatever it is, I'll help you fix it.”

Akira blinked, genuinely caught off-guard for a moment, before smiling sadly. “I don't know if I could ask something like that of you… especially not if it's what I think it is.”

“Why not? And what do you think it is in the first place? It can't be _that_ bad….”

Ryuji scratched his head, trying to figure out what could possibly be wrong with Akira--the guy was almost infuriatingly perfect in every way, save for not having a Persona, and even then he still managed to hold his own in the Metaverse.

“Does it have something to do with you not having a Persona?” Ryuji questioned, taking a shot in the dark. Another thought occurred to him as he remembered Akira's consistent reactions to the Meta-Nav, and he added worriedly, “Is it like… hurting you or something? Going into the Metaverse without a Persona, I mean.”

“Why would you say that?” Akira questioned curiously.

“Well, I mean… y’know what I was saying before, about thinking something was wrong?” Akira nodded, and Ryuji continued. “Well, like I said, I dunno if I was overthinking things or what, but… every time we used the Meta-Nav, you looked like you were in pain. So, I thought… I dunno, maybe you were forcing yourself to come along or something.”

Akira hummed in thought, his expression unreadable, before slowly responding, “You're… not right, but you're not entirely wrong either.”

“How can I be wrong and right at the same time??” Ryuji questioned with a bewildered expression, prompting an amused smile from Akira.

“What I'm saying is you're close, but not quite on the mark.” Akira shifted, seeming to brace himself before holding his hand out towards Ryuji. “Give me your phone for a minute.”

Ryuji blinked, confused by the sudden request, but he obeyed anyway and handed over his phone.

(He didn't even think to question how Akira knew the passcode to unlock his phone--it just seemed like one of those inexplicable _Akira_ things, like how Akira always knew the right things to say, or how he could tell what Ryuji did and didn't like without Ryuji having to say a word.)

Ryuji leaned over to see what Akira was doing, his eyes widening in surprise when Akira opened the Meta-Nav app.

“What are you--" He cut himself off as Akira opened a new search, getting a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach even before Akira opened his mouth, responding to each of the Meta-Nav’s robotic questions with hardly any hesitation.

“ _Name?_ ”

“Akira Kurusu.”

“ _Place?_ ”

“All of Tokyo.”

“ _Keyword?_ ”

“... Prison.”

Akira smiled humorlessly, watching Ryuji's stunned expression as he passed his phone back to him.

“... Like I thought. It’s a hit.”

“... You….” The phone nearly slid out of Ryuji’s slack grip, unsure of how to even process what was happening. “Why…? How…?”

Akira closed his eyes, letting out a soft sigh that sounded so nonchalant that Ryuji almost punched him.

“... I had my suspicions ever since Kamoshida's palace, but I admittedly put off confirming it.”

“And let me guess,” Ryuji started as he shoved his phone back into his pocket, his words coming out through clenched teeth as anger started replacing his shock, “you would’a kept putting it off if I never said nothing, right?”

“There was no point in bringing it up--"

“You have a fuckin’ _palace!_ ” Ryuji exclaimed, jumping to his feet in irritation. “You don't think that's something your _friends_ should know?!”

Akira sighed again. “... This is why I didn't want to bring it up. It isn't hurting me in any way, so there's no need to--"

“I'm going in.”

Akira jolted, a flash of fear crossing his face before he covered it up with a stern expression. “Ryuji, no.”

“But getting rid of your palace will _help_ you! What the hell's the problem?!”

“It's not about helping me! It's about losing you!” Akira shouted back, startling Ryuji into silence. “Even if you change my heart, whatever you see in there… you won't want to be around me again. You'll never trust me again. No one would, after seeing something like this.”

Ryuji faltered, letting out a long sigh and running a hand through his hair before fixing Akira with an exasperated expression. “Look, man… I don't know what kind of shit you're hiding, but I kinda hoped you already knew that I've got your back no matter what.” His expression softened into a smile as he added, “Nothing’s gonna change that, I promise.”

Akira closed his eyes for a long moment, so long that Ryuji began to worry if he’d passed out--before finally letting out a shaky breath and looking back at Ryuji. “... I know I can’t stop you. I would have been more surprised if you _hadn’t_ insisted on going--but you have to go by yourself. That's my condition for agreeing to this.”

Ryuji's eyes widened slightly, admittedly a bit nervous about the idea of tackling a palace without any backup, and Akira gave him a reassuring smile.

“If I'm right, you won't even have to fight, so don't worry.”

“But… I mean, don't all palaces have shadows ‘n’ security ‘n’ stuff?”

“Yes, but this is my palace, and you're _you_ \--I could never see you as an intruder or a danger, no matter how reluctant I am about this.”

Ryuji glanced away in embarrassment, flattered by Akira's trust in him, and suddenly it hit him just _how much_ trust Akira was actually putting into him in agreeing to let Ryuji enter his palace. Things could go horribly wrong, Ryuji could fuck up and make Akira go insane or _kill_ him--

“Ryuji.” Akira broke through Ryuji's downward-spiraling thoughts with a hand over his own and another reassuring expression. “I wasn't avoiding this because I was wary of you--I know you'll be able to pull it off. I just… I'd like for you to promise that you won't hate me, but that would be cruel to ask.”

“Dude, short of you straight-up murdering someone, I don't think I could ever hate you--and even then, depending on who you killed I'd probably just help you hide the body.”

Akira couldn't help but crack an amused smile at that, and Ryuji grinned in response, clapping a hand on Akira's shoulder as he tried to keep his tone jovial, both for his own sake and for Akira's.

“Everything's gonna be fine, alright? Just leave it to me.”

_I won't fuck up. Akira's trusting me with something huge like this; I ain't gonna let him down._

Akira nodded, and Ryuji reluctantly backed away as he pulled his phone back out.

“So, uh… I'm guessing I should, um… do this now?”

“The sooner the better, I suppose,” Akira responded, the slightest bit of trepidation slipping into his tone before he quickly covered it up with a wry smile. “Though I think you should do it a bit farther from here--I don’t know how well things will go if I end up accidentally getting pulled into my own palace with you.”

Ryuji blinked. “... Is that even possible?”

“You’re entering a cognitive world, practically anything is possible.”

“Guess that’s true,” Ryuji conceded. “Alright, outside the cafe should be far away enough, right?”

Akira nodded, meeting Ryuji’s eyes with an unreadable expression. “... Thank you,” he murmured after a moment. “And I’m sorry.”

Ryuji smiled. “Just promise you’ll be more honest with me about shit after this, alright?”

“I promise.”

Nodding in satisfaction, Ryuji left the room and made his way downstairs, each step feeling heavier than the last until he was physically dragging his feet out the front door of the cafe, all of his previous worries coming back full-force now that Akira wasn’t in front of him to chase them away.

_Fuck… am I seriously going through with this? Maybe… maybe I should call Ann, or find Morgana, or--_

He tensed slightly before vigorously shaking his head.

_No. Akira trusted me enough to agree to let me do this--I can’t go breaking his trust before I even get into his palace. I can do this. Akira said I can do this, so I can do this._

Taking a few breaths to calm himself, Ryuji reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, opening the Meta-Nav and pulling up the history.

“Well, here goes nothing.”

Ryuji pressed the button, and the world around him began to distort.

* * *

And now here Ryuji was, warily wandering through the halls of the prison that he’d found himself in, wondering briefly if all prisons were like this before realizing that--duh, this was a palace, of course this was nothing like a real prison.

After all, real prisons couldn’t possibly be as big as an entire city.

“Shit, of course Akira would have a fucking huge-ass palace like this--the guy doesn’t know how to half-ass _anything,_ does he,” Ryuji grumbled under his breath, tensing and glancing warily at the shadows that approached him before letting out a relieved sigh as they walked right past him. “Guess he was right about not having to fight though, that should make things easier.”

Even Ryuji’s clothes hadn’t changed into his Skull outfit, making the feeling of walking through the prison halls even more surreal--but Ryuji would take the weird disconnect over having to fight all of the shadows in this palace any day.

(And _fuck_ there were a lot of shadows--all faceless people in prison outfits, wandering around like people strolling through the city, if people wandering the city all kept their heads down and their shoulders drooped listlessly.)

Ryuji turned a corner and came face to face with a large door, frowning as he saw a card where the door’s handle should have been. Curiously, he reached out and pulled the card out of its slot in the door, lifting it up to try and examine it.

“... ‘Lemat’? What’s--” Ryuji squinted, before spotting a translation of whatever language was on the card (Spanish? English? Italian? Who knows) written at the very top. “‘ _The Fool_ ’...?”

Ryuji jumped as the door suddenly began opening on its own, and he tensed, reflexively moving to grab his weapon before remembering that he was currently unarmed.

_Well, hopefully whatever’s on the other side of that door doesn’t see me as a threat…._


	2. Chapter 2

With the card he just obtained still in hand, Ryuji made his way through the door and into the next room--

\--and nearly backpedaled the fuck out the door when he saw the creepiest looking old man grinning at him from behind a desk.

“Welcome,” the old man (who Ryuji could only assume was also a shadow, though Ryuji wished his face was indiscernible like the rest of the shadows here because this guy was creepy as _fuck_ ) greeted with a smile that sent an unpleasant chill down Ryuji’s spine, his fingers steepled under his chin as his wide, bloodshot eyes stared directly at Ryuji.

“Who are you?” Ryuji asked, warily taking a step forward. “If you’re here to fight--”

The old man chuckled. “My role is not to fight, merely to guide.”

“... Guide?” Ryuji’s stance relaxed marginally at that. “So you’re gonna help me? I thought shadows were supposed to  _stop_ thieves from getting to the treasure, not help ‘em out.”

Again, the old man chuckled, and Ryuji found the noise both unnerving and irritating. “Perhaps that is true of most palaces, but as I’m sure you already know, Akira Kurusu is a special case.”

Ryuji sighed. “Guess that’s one way of putting it…,” he muttered, idly toying with the card in his hand before turning his attention back to the old man with a determined expression. “Alright, so what do I gotta do to get his treasure, then?”

“You already possess one of the necessary keys,” the old man began, gesturing to the card in Ryuji’s hand. “You merely have to assemble them all, and the path will be open.”

“That don’t sound too hard…. How many are there?”

“You will have to discover that for yourself.”

Ryuji groaned. “I thought you were supposed to help!”

The old man let out another irritating chuckle. “Guidance merely means setting you on the right path. If you desire answers, you must seek them out yourself.”

“Fine, fine,” Ryuji grumbled. “Can I at least get some kinda hint or something?”

“Very well then, I suppose I can leave you with one piece of advice: each card has a meaning, and you would do well to learn them all before you reach your final destination.”

“A meaning? How the hell am I supposed to know what the cards mean?”

The old man’s grin widened. “You must take your time, and listen carefully to all information you are presented with in this palace. Only a Fool acts recklessly when the situation demands caution.”

Ryuji scowled, about to yell at the old man for calling him a fool when he paused and forcibly bit his tongue, realizing he’d be playing right into the old man’s accusation if he acted on his knee-jerk response.

_This guy ain’t telling me shit straight out, but there has to be a reason why he said what he did…._ Ryuji idly glanced down, before blinking as he looked at the card in his hand.

“... ‘ _The Fool_ ’...,” Ryuji murmured, tentatively glancing back up as he asked, “So this card means… acting recklessly or something?”

“Negligence and recklessness go hand in hand,” was the old man’s reply, which Ryuji took both as a warning and an answer.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Ryuji responded, slipping the card into his pocket, before pausing and gripping his head in pain as a strong pulsation washed over him.

_Wh… what the hell--_

**_What is this place…? Why am I here?_ **

Ryuji flinched as Akira's voice suddenly rang out in his head, images playing behind his closed eyes like a memory.

A memory that wasn't his.

* * *

_He could see himself (Akira?) looking down, examining the prison clothes on his body and the shackles around his wrists before looking through the bars._

_There, he saw two young girls dressed as prison guards, each one standing on either side of the desk in the center of the room, where an old man sat watching him._

_The old man chuckled, his fingers steepled under his chin as he smiled darkly._

_“_ **_Welcome to the Velvet Room._ ** _"_

* * *

Ryuji jerked, but before he could open his mouth, Akira's voice cut through his thoughts once more.

**_Nothing bad will happen… I’m sure everything will be fine like this. He doesn’t need me, anyway. It’s fine, everything is fine…._ **

Ryuji swallowed thickly, bracing himself for anything else before letting out a relieved sigh when everything went quiet once more.

He turned his attention to the old man warily, wanting to demand answers-- _what the hell did he just see, why did he see it, why was Akira a prisoner, what the hell was “The Velvet Room"_ \--before taking one look at the man's grin and figuring it wouldn't be worth the headache of dealing with riddles and roundabout answers.

“I wish you luck,” the old man said, gesturing to the door behind him with a quiet chuckle.

“... Thanks,” Ryuji reluctantly replied, before quickly moving around the old man and over to the door, eager to move on from this unsettling room.

He figured whoever was past the door had to be a bit easier to deal with (or at least a bit easier on the eyes).

“Yo.”

Well, at least he was right about the easier on the eyes part.

Ryuji stared, dumbfounded, at the first cell in a long line of jail cells, hardly even noticing the door closing and disappearing behind him.

He was a bit too busy staring at the shadow that looked and sounded exactly like him to really pay much attention to a door.

“... I guess it makes sense that there’d be a shadow version of me here, but….” Ryuji took a wary step forward, not even sure where to begin. “Why are you in a jail cell?”

Shadow Ryuji shrugged, looking surprisingly relaxed for someone trapped in a jail cell as he leaned back against the wall.

(If anyone else had a shadow version of him in their cognitive world, Ryuji would have found it creepy, but the fact that this was Akira’s palace and the fact that this Shadow Ryuji’s posture and expression and voice and _everything_ felt so similar to Ryuji himself was almost flattering--that had to mean that Akira paid a lot of attention to his mannerisms and stuff, right?)

“I’m pretty much you, so I doubt I can give you any answers that you can’t come up with yourself,” Shadow Ryuji replied, before adding, “But if I had to guess, I’d say it’s ‘cuz Akira feels like we’re all trapped.”

“But those other shadows were walking around outside of cells--”

“But Akira doesn’t know those other people, right?” Shadow Ryuji countered, giving the real Ryuji pause.

“... So then all these cells… they’re all people Akira knows?”

Shadow Ryuji shrugged. “If I had a guess, that’d be it. Anyways, you prolly wanna check outside the cells for what you need. The sooner you can help Akira the better, right?”

Ryuji frowned and looked outside the cell, finding another card and pulling it out of the indentation in the wall next to the cell door. “‘ _The Chariot_ ’... hey, what’s this one mean? That creepy old guy with the giant nose said I needed to learn all the meanings for the cards or something like that.”

Shadow Ryuji ambled over towards the cell bars, reaching out and plucking the card out of Ryuji's hand. “Get this: see how the card’s face up?”

Ryuji blinked in confusion. “Uh-huh…?”

“Like this, it means shit like control and willpower and stuff--all good things, like having the strength ‘n’ confidence to overcome all the bad shit in our life. But if you flip it around…,” Shadow Ryuji turned the card upside-down before continuing, “the meaning changes ‘n’ becomes bad: instead of control, there's no control; instead of willpower, there's no willpower… stuff like that.” Shadow Ryuji smiled. “Can’t say I know much ‘bout all these fortune telling cards, but when I found out Akira was getting into them, and when he told me there was a card he associated me with… well, figured I’d at least learn what I could ‘bout that one even if I wasn’t much into all that stuff myself, y’know?”

Ryuji's brows furrowed in confusion, even as he reached out to take the card back from his shadow. “I didn't know he had a card that he associated with me--I didn't know he was into any of this stuff at all.”

Shadow Ryuji's smile died down. “Sorry. You ‘n’ I've prolly got different memories with him.”

“Different memories? What do you mean--!!”

Ryuji grimaced and gripped his head as another strong pulsation washed over him.

“... Again…?”

**_I have to do something… he's going to die, I have to help him!_ **

* * *

_Ryuji seeing himself through Akira's eyes was almost as unsettling as the realization that he remembered this exact scenario, except Akira_ **_hadn't been there_ ** _._

_He could feel the pain of an awakening washing over him, hear the voice of Akira's Persona (but he didn’t have a Persona?) creating their contract, feel the rush of power and_ **_freedom_ ** _that came with breaking free of society's shackles…._

_And he could see the shock and awe on his own face as he stared up at Akira, bruised and battered and completely Persona-less, unlike Ryuji’s own memory of that day._

* * *

**_What's the point? I've never had any control over my life, so why bother fighting it?_ **

Ryuji blinked dazedly, silently demanding answers from the shadow that watched him with a sympathetic yet knowing gaze.

“Don’t give me that look, man. I can only tell you so much; the rest you've gotta figure out on your own.” Shadow Ryuji grinned. “You ain't as dumb as people say you are, y’know--you don't need my help to piece all this shit together.”

(Now Ryuji knew for sure that this shadow had to be Akira’s cognition--only Akira would push his desire for Ryuji to have more self-esteem onto Ryuji’s shadow; anyone else that had a shadow Ryuji would no doubt have made him talk and act like an idiot.)

“Each of these cards… they've got two meanings,” Ryuji started slowly, giving his shadow the chance to correct him at any point. “This one here, ‘ _The Chariot'_... I kinda get why Akira might think of me for this one--though the positive side of it might be a bit generous, it does sound like something Akira would say about me.” Ryuji cracked a small, brief smile before continuing. “I keep hearing his voice saying two different things… kinda like… like the two different meanings?” Shadow Ryuji nodded encouragingly, and Ryuji felt both relieved and proud that he was starting to figure shit out without it being spelled out for him. “I was also seeing... memories, I guess? But how could there be a memory with me in it that I remember completely different?”

“Can’t answer that, unfortunately,” Shadow Ryuji responded, genuinely sounding regretful. “Everything’ll make sense in the end though… or as much sense as any of this can make, anyway.”

Ryuji nodded and pocketed the card, feeling his pocket to make sure both cards were there before giving his shadow a grin.

“This really gave talking to yourself a whole new meaning.”

Shadow Ryuji laughed and returned Ryuji's grin with an identical one of his own.

“Hey, at least y'know you make good conversation.”

Ryuji snorted in amusement. “Better than that creepy old man--does Akira seriously know someone like that?”

Shadow Ryuji's smile died down slightly. “That's, uh… short answer is yes, but anything more than that you'll have to wait to understand.”

Ryuji shrugged. “‘s all good. You've been way more help than him, so thanks.”

“Just don’t expect things to be as easy as they were with me,” Shadow Ryuji replied with an amused smile. “Not everyone's as straightforward as us.”

“Would be so much easier if they were, though.” Ryuji shrugged with a smile. “But hey, if it's to help Akira, I think I'll find a way to manage.”

“Couldn’t’ve said it better myself.”

Ryuji gave his shadow a wave over his shoulder as he parted ways with him, slipping a hand inside his pocket to run his fingers over the Chariot card.

_The strength and confidence to overcome all the bad shit, huh…._

Ryuji stared off into the distance, looking at all the jail cells spread out ahead of him.

_Sure as hell hope I can live up to that._


	3. Chapter 3

The hallway stretched on for longer than Ryuji realized at first glance, as did the space between each jail cell--it wasn’t exactly the longest walk he’d taken by far, but there was enough distance between the cell with his shadow and the next jail cell that he could just barely see the first cell anymore.

(Or maybe it was just some weird cognition thing. Palaces made no sense to him before and they weren’t going to magically start making sense now.)

“Hey, Blondie. Mind getting me out of here?”

Ryuji jerked to a stop at the familiar voice, unable to help cracking an amused smile as he looked down to see Morgana--or his shadow, anyway--in the jail cell in front of him.

“I dunno, you obviously look like an enemy.”

Shadow Morgana rolled his eyes, though the amusement was as clear on his face as it was on Ryuji’s. “Only you would start getting nostalgic seeing me behind bars.”

“Hey, you started it,” Ryuji teased, grabbing the card out of the wall next to the cell before squatting down to Shadow Morgana’s height. “Okay, so straight to the point--what’s up with this place, and with these cards?”

“Unfortunately, if you think I’m going to give you all the answers--”

“Yeah, yeah, I know, I gotta figure shit out myself, but could’ja at least help me along a little?”

Shadow Morgana eyed Ryuji for a moment before letting out a sigh. “Alright, but you’d better listen closely, got it?”

Ryuji nodded, shifting so he was sitting cross-legged on the floor. “‘kay, I’m all ears.”

“As I said before, I can’t give you a full explanation, but… both this palace and the tarot cards are connected to Akira’s fate.”

“His fate?” Ryuji questioned before biting his tongue, expecting Shadow Morgana to chastise him for interrupting--but instead, the shadow merely nodded.

(Maybe Akira’s desire for Morgana to get along with Ryuji bled into Shadow Morgana’s behavior? Ryuji wasn’t complaining if that was the case, it would make getting through this conversation a whole lot easier.)

“His fate isn’t one that’s easily overcome--we thought that everything ended well, but….” Shadow Morgana trailed off sadly, shaking his head slightly before continuing. “Anyway, the point is that his palace is different: most palaces are born from the distorted desires of people, but Akira's palace was born from his distorted regrets.”

“Is that why everything feels all…,” Ryuji trailed off with a frown, trying to find the right word.

“Listless?” Shadow Morgana supplied.

“Yeah, that.”

Shadow Morgana nodded. “Which in turn means that you will not be stealing his _desires_ , but rather the _regrets_ that are chaining him down.”

Ryuji frowned but said nothing, allowing the shadow to continue speaking.

“As for the tarot cards, they represent each person that Akira has formed a close bond with since first coming to Tokyo. It’s a symbol of who they are, and the kind of qualities he’s learned from them… both good and bad.”

Ryuji hummed in thought. “... So does that mean he learned about… having the strength to overcome shit from me? I’m pretty sure I didn’t have _that_ big of an effect on him….”

Shadow Morgana rolled his eyes. “You have a much bigger effect on him than you realize--and that isn’t the only thing he picked up from you. The frustration that you feel when things are out of your control is something he also learned to embrace, for better or for worse.”

Ryuji grimaced as his thoughts immediately shot back to Kamoshida, the utter _powerlessness_ he felt and the anger and frustration that came with it, and he wondered if Akira really felt things like that--he always seemed so in control of everything, including (and especially) his emotions.

“... What about you?” Ryuji asked after a moment of silence, glancing down at the card that he’d taken from next to the cell--” _The Magician_ ”. “How’s this card relate to you?”

Shadow Morgana closed his eyes, his arms crossed across his chest. “I suppose if I had to give a simple answer, the meanings that can best be attributed to me would be ‘willpower’ and ‘deception’--true power in contrast to illusions, in terms of the Magician itself.”

Ryuji frowned. “Alright, willpower I can kinda get--I mean, you’re pretty stubborn ‘n’ stuff, and I can see how Akira’d get some of that from you--but deception? Does that mean you lied to us?” Another thought occurred to Ryuji, and he asked incredulously, “Does that mean _Akira’s_ lying to us? I mean I figured there was shit he wasn’t saying, but _lying_ is….”

Shadow Morgana glanced up at Ryuji regretfully. “I can’t answer that.”

“Of course,” Ryuji muttered with a sigh, before grimacing and gripping his head. “Goddammit, not again….”

**_We’ll get through this--we can’t lose, we_ ** **_won’t_ ** **_!_ **

* * *

_This time, Ryuji could safely say that he had no memory that even came close to what he was seeing: himself and Yusuke on (presumably) Akira’s left, and Morgana on Akira’s right… and in front of them was what looked to be a giant golden lion with a man sitting on top, looking so self-righteous that Ryuji wanted to punch him without even knowing who the fuck he was._

_“Risking our lives to stop rotten adults…. That’s why we’re phantom thieves!”_

_Ryuji had no idea whose voice that was--it was a girl’s voice, yet he couldn’t see anyone else around from his limited viewpoint, and it didn’t sound like Ann’s voice--but whoever it was, despite not knowing what the fuck was happening, Ryuji agreed with her wholeheartedly._

_He could feel Akira’s grip tighten around his dagger, could feel the confidence surging through him--and one more glance at his teammates showed that same confidence reflected in their eyes._

_Akira was their leader for a reason, after all. If he had the willpower to see this through, then so did the rest of the Phantom Thieves._

* * *

**_I can’t let them find out… I have to just play along, everything will be fine if I just pretend…._ **

Ryuji warily cracked an eye open, his head still pounding as he tried to understand what he just saw.

“... I can’t explain anything, before you ask,” Shadow Morgana piped up, though his expression was genuinely regretful enough to warrant Ryuji holding his tongue and not pushing the matter.

“Kinda figured you’d say that,” Ryuji responded with a sigh. “Akira’d better give me some damn answers once I find him.”

Shadow Morgana nodded. “I’m sure he will. Just be patient until then.”

“Patience ain’t exactly my strong point, but I’ll do my best.” Ryuji rose to his feet and stretched a bit before slipping the newest card into his pocket with the others. “Anyways, thanks for the help, Mona--or, uh… Shadow Mona.”

Shadow Morgana let out an amused huff. “Good luck, rookie--you’d better not let our leader down.”

“I won’t, I swear.”

Ryuji began making his way away from the cell, only to come to a stop when a thought occurred to him.

_… When did we start calling Akira our leader…?_

He knew for a fact that they’d never decided on a leader for their group, since none of the Persona users in their group never really fit the position--yet for some odd reason the name “Leader” felt just as familiar as calling Akira “Joker”....

Feeling a bit unsettled from the disconnect in his memories, Ryuji turned around to question Shadow Morgana--

\--only to pale as the cell behind him completely vanished, leaving nothing but an empty hallway behind him.

“... Guess I won’t get a second chance if I don’t get to ask the right questions… dammit Akira, couldn’t you make this just a _bit_ easier for me?”

“You say that like he isn’t already making this easier for you,” a voice piped up from further down the hall, and Ryuji didn’t even need to reach the cell before figuring out who it was.

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Ryuji grumbled, approaching the next cell and leaning back against it as he glanced over at Ann’s shadow. “But all this thinking is making my head spin--not to mention all these memories and crap being shoved into my head.”

Shadow Ann rolled her eyes, giving Ryuji’s shoulder a light smack. “Stop complaining. You’re the one that agreed to help Akira, right? So man up and get through it.”

Ryuji groaned. “I _know_ , alright? Jeez, you’re just as pushy as the real Ann.” He huffed. “Why the hell does Akira have to be good at everything, seriously--even his _shadows_ are perfect imitations for fuck’s sake.”

“I’d _love_ to see what your shadow version of me would be like if you’re impressed by this,” Shadow Ann commented dryly.

Ryuji grinned. “Well for starters, she’d be a hell of a lot nicer and show off her boobs a bit m-- _owowow I was_ **_kidding_** _!!_ ”

Shadow Ann scowled, bending Ryuji’s arm back just a bit more through the bars before huffing and letting go. “You have a horrible sense of humor.”

“And you have no sense of humor at all,” Ryuji shot back with a pained grimace as he rubbed his arm. “Still got that same crazy strength though.”

Still, as much as he complained, he couldn’t help but feel relieved and comforted by the familiar bickering--especially knowing that he still had a long way to go, and would most likely be running out of friendly faces sooner rather than later.

Shadow Ann seemed to sense this, as she gave him a light elbow through the bars, her smile softening slightly. “C’mon, I know it’s not easy, but you’ve got to focus. Go and grab that card, and I’ll see what I can tell you about it.”

Ryuji straightened up and turned to check the wall next to the cell, spotting the card and pulling it out before taking a look at it. “‘ _The Lovers_ ’? Really?” Ryuji questioned with a skeptical raise of his eyebrow.

Shadow Ann huffed. “What’s that supposed to mean? You don’t even know what the card stands for.”

“Uh… being in a relationship? Which you’re not, last I checked?’

“No, you idiot, it stands for harmony and trust--it’s not just about being literal lovers, it’s about having a strong relationship in general!” Shadow Ann stood with a hand on her hip as she frowned at Ryuji.

“What’s the other meaning? Not getting along, or something?”

Shadow Ann shrugged. “More or less? It’s kinda just like… conflict and stuff, I think.”

“Hmm….” Ryuji looked down at the card in his hand. “Conflict… with other people?”

“Or with yourself,” Shadow Ann responded. “It could be either, from what I remember.”

Ryuji frowned, bracing himself for the pain that he knew would be coming any second now--he may not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but even he could pick up on something as simple as a pattern.

Meet a shadow, discuss a card, and forcibly have one of Akira’s memories shoved into his head for his viewing (dis)pleasure. Ryuji wished he could say he was getting used to it, but he had a feeling he’d never get used to such a disorienting sensation no matter how many times it happened.

As he figured, he felt the sharp rush of pain in his head, though slightly dulled--either because he actually _was_ getting used to it, or because Akira was somehow cutting him a break.

And speaking of Akira, he could hear his voice echoing around him once again.

**_Our first trip abroad together…._ **

* * *

_“Why don’t we take a group shot before we take off?”_

_Akira’s gaze moved over to look at Ann on his left before he glanced over to his left, where Ryuji could see himself and one more girl standing._

_From what Ryuji could tell, the four of them were at an airport, but Ryuji barely had time to think about anything as he took in the tired yet happy group of four squeezing together while Akira held up his phone, the closeness--not just physical, but emotional as well--between them making itself obvious even to an observer like him._

* * *

**_Am I really doing the right thing…? They deserve to know, but if they find out…._ **

Ryuji let out a breath as he leaned back against the cell bars, glancing over his shoulder as he felt a hand lightly pressing against his back.

“You okay?” Shadow Ann questioned.

Ryuji made a noise that was neither a confirmation nor a denial, closing his eyes as he tried to sort out his thoughts.

“That trip that I just saw… I know we definitely never went away together like that,” Ryuji started, running a hand through his hair as he spoke. “But… don’t we got a trip coming up towards the end of the year? To Hawaii or something?”

“Of course you would remember something like that,” Shadow Ann teased lightly, and Ryuji’s lips briefly curled upwards in response.

“Shut it, I’m trying to be serious here.” Ryuji’s smile quickly fell back into a frown. “This is kinda crazy, but the more I think about it… does Akira, like… know the future or something?”

“Hmm… well, you’re _close_.”

“Close ain’t the same as being right though,” Ryuji responded with a sigh. “And I’m guessing you can’t explain anything more than that either?”

“Nope~” Shadow Ann popped the “p” as she smiled, prompting a smile of resigned amusement from Ryuji.

“Fine, fine, I get it.” Ryuji straightened up, stretching himself out a bit before grinning at Shadow Ann. “Thanks, though. I think I’m finally starting to get the hang of this place.”

“Glad to hear it.” Shadow Ann reached out through the bars to give Ryuji’s shoulder one last, friendly pat. “Good luck with the rest of the palace, alright? Don’t keep Akira waiting for longer than necessary.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know.”

Ryuji rolled his shoulders, staring ahead at the seemingly-endless hallway with renewed purpose, despite having--or perhaps because he had--more questions than answers.

“Don’t worry, Akira… I’m gonna figure this shit out, and I’ll help change your heart. Just you wait.”


	4. Chapter 4

On any other occasion, Ryuji would have been impressed--awed, even--by just how many people Akira had managed to befriend in his short time in Tokyo, and by the _diversity_ of the people.

Seriously, what high schooler befriended doctors, cafe owners, his own _homeroom teacher_ (Ryuji’s pretty sure he had a heart attack when he saw Kawakami), shady gun shop owners (Ryuji’s _definitely_ sure he had a heart attack when he saw Iwai), and even _politicians_?

Oh, and also Mishima. But Ryuji already knew about him, so he wasn’t much of a surprise.

However, having to actually interact with each of these strangers (or borderline-strangers) made Ryuji even more self-conscious of how bumbling he was compared to Akira, who had the charm and intelligence to interact with adults on their level.

(Not to mention how it was just awkward as hell discussing things like tarot cards and their meanings--which felt personal, almost intrusive--with them, and seeing memories and hearing thoughts that Ryuji had no idea what to make of.)

Once Ryuji finally found another familiar face around his age, though, he almost wished he was back fumbling his way through conversations with the adults.

“Ah… Sakamoto-kun, was it?”

Ryuji very, _very_ reluctantly turned to look at the young detective standing behind cell bars, finding his fake-pleasant smile more irritating than normal.

“Never thought I’d see a detective behind bars,” Ryuji quipped--because honestly, he had to be allowed that much, Akira’s cognition be damned.

Shadow Akechi let out a soft laugh that was about as genuine as the plastic smile on his pretty-boy face. “I suppose you have a point. This is… certainly an odd situation, though understandable considering the circumstances.”

“‘Understandable’ my ass,” Ryuji muttered, before snatching the card from next to Shadow Akechi’s cell and glancing at it. “Somehow I’m not surprised that your card is ‘ _Justice_ ’--sounds about as pretentious as you.”

“I can’t seem to recall what I may have done to spark such animosity, but I must admit, it’s quite refreshing--as is your simplicity and candor.”

Ryuji glared as the detective continued to smile at him. “Don’t try ‘n’ act all friendly with me--I don’t get why or how Akira formed a close bond with you, but don’t think I forgot how you keep giving the Phantom Thieves a bad rep.”

“Oh? And why would that affect you specifically?” Shadow Akechi questioned, his smile widening a fraction as Ryuji grimaced. “As I said, your simplicity and candor really is refreshing.”

“Shut up! You’re just Akira’s cognition anyway, you ain’t the real detective!”

“True, but I would advise you to be a bit more cautious around my real counterpart--you wouldn’t want to put Kurusu-kun in danger, now would you?”

Ryuji tensed, his eyes narrowing at the thinly-veiled threat. “... You saying you’re gonna be some kinda danger to him?”

“Well, it wouldn’t be beneficial to you for a detective to discover the true identity of the thieves he’s looking into, now would it?”

Ryuji scowled, Shadow Akechi’s smile sending a cold chill of dread down his spine. “... I’ll keep that in mind,” he responded through clenched teeth, hating that he knew that Shadow Akechi was right.

It wouldn’t be the first time that his lack of brain-to-mouth filter got them in hot water, but Ryuji resolved to at least make an effort so it would be the last.

**_It’s finally beginning…. He’s finally making his move._ **

Ryuji jerked slightly, startled by Akira’s voice--the headaches had (thankfully) been getting less and less painful the more memories he saw, until it became a small twinge that he barely even registered. Still, he reflexively reached up and rubbed his head as he braced himself for whatever he was about to see.

* * *

_Akira’s gaze flickered around the small room, giving Ryuji hardly any time to process all the faces--both familiar and unfamiliar--before Akira’s gaze settled on Akechi._

_Akechi, the last person any of them (save for possibly Akira) wanted around._

_Akechi, the detective in a room filled with phantom thieves._

_Akechi, who was going on about striking a deal with them--a deal that sounded a hell of a lot like blackmail if Ryuji had anything to say about it._

_“This ain’t no deal! It’s blackmail!”_

_Well, good to know that Ryuji’s thought process didn’t change much in the (presumable) future._

_“Say what you will. This is the method that I believe is correct.”_

_Akira’s gaze remained fixated on Akechi as he spoke, taking in his heated expression, and Ryuji could have sworn he felt Akira’s disappointment--though for what, Ryuji couldn’t say._

_“The justice I uphold will not tolerate criminals who kill people at their leisure.”_

* * *

**_I can’t doubt myself--I’m doing the right thing. As long as everything turns out alright for them in the end, then why should I feel guilty for keeping them in the dark?_ **

Ryuji’s hand moved off of his head as he clenched it into a fist by his side, and he had to shove the card into his pocket with the others before he ended up crushing it in frustration.

“I take it you didn’t like what you saw? Or perhaps it was what you heard that bothered you?”

Shadow Akechi watched him with knowing eyes, and Ryuji wasn’t sure whether he wanted to punch Akira or Akechi more.

“Somehow, I get the feeling that you ‘n’ Akira are way too alike.” The words slipped out without much thought (so much for working on his brain-to-mouth filter), but at the very least, he finally managed to wipe that fake smile off the detective’s face.

“... That’s a surprisingly astute observation, coming from you.”

“Don’ think I won’t get an insult just ‘cuz you wrapped it up in fancy words.”

Shadow Akechi laughed, and Ryuji was surprised to find that it sounded almost… _genuine_.

_Yeah right. Like this bastard is even capable of a genuine_ **_anything_** _._

“My apologies. What I meant to say was… you’re right. For better or for worse, Kurusu-kun and I share qualities and thought processes that, oddly enough, both align with and mirror one another.” Shadow Akechi smiled wistfully. “Strange, isn’t it? That two people can be so alike, yet so different…. It really is a shame that I couldn’t have met him even just a year earlier.”

Ryuji faltered, trying to force his hostility aside as he let out a sigh and ran a hand through his hair. “I guess I can get that much--wishing that Akira could’ve been around earlier, I mean. I’m still glad I met him when I did, but….”

He trailed off as he started to think: what _would_ it have been like if he’d become friends with Akira a year earlier? Would they even have become friends, without the common ground of Kamoshida’s palace and the Metaverse tying them together? Ryuji certainly hoped so--it would have been nice if Akira had been able to see him in his prime, as the star of the track team, instead of some pathetic ostracized delinquent with horrible posture and an unmistakable limp in his step.

Shadow Akechi seemed to follow Ryuji’s train of thought as he spoke quietly. “The past cannot be changed, no matter what Kurusu-kun may think. Cherish the present and the future that you have with him… not everyone is lucky enough to have that chance.”

Ryuji pursed his lips, eyeing Shadow Akechi for a moment before huffing. “Don’t need you telling me that--I ain’t gonna take nothing for granted. I know I’m lucky to have Akira in my life.”

Shadow Akechi smiled, but he was unable to respond as Ryuji spoke up first.

“Y’know, you wouldn’t be so annoying to deal with if you smiled like that more often. Makes you look a bit less like a pretentious douche.”

Shadow Akechi blinked in surprise before laughing, a hand moving up to cover his face as he turned away slightly. “I can see why Kurusu-kun enjoys your company,” he said after a moment, much to Ryuji’s embarrassment. “I’ve never met anyone quite like you, though Kurusu-kun does have his moments of blunt honesty as well--perhaps from spending so much time around you.”

Ryuji huffed. “Something wrong with that?”

“Not at all. As I said before, it’s refreshing.”

Ryuji shifted awkwardly, both from lingering embarrassment and annoyance that came from finding less and less reasons to stay irritated with the detective--he wanted to hate him and be wary of him, he knew he probably had every right to, but… he had a feeling that if he wasn’t a detective trying to take them down, Akechi could have fit in with the rest of their ragtag group of friends.

He shook his head slightly. No, it was too late for that, Akechi was already--

_… Already what? Why is it too late?_

Shadow Akechi took a step away from the cell bars, his fake smile fitting back onto his face so smoothly that Ryuji almost felt pity in place of his previous irritation.

“Well, as pleasant as this was, you have more important things to do.”

Ryuji nodded. “... Yeah. Still gotta get the rest of the cards ‘n’ help Akira.”

“Go on, then. Best not to keep him waiting.”

“Right.” Ryuji took a few steps away from the cell before pausing. “... Hey, uh… look, I don’t really got the full picture here, but… if some shit happened with you, well… I mean, it’d probably take some time to forgive you if, like, you got Akira arrested or some shit, but knowing Akira he’d prolly be the first to forgive you ‘n’ accept you with open arms, and I’m sure we’d all be able to move on after that, so, like… shit, I dunno what I’m even saying....”

Ryuji ran a hand through his hair in frustration before forcing himself to turn back around, intending on facing Shadow Akechi properly.

He could have sworn he saw one last, genuine smile on Shadow Akechi’s face before the cell disappeared.

Staring at the empty space for a moment longer, Ryuji let out a sigh as he turned back around and continued forward.

* * *

Ryuji was beyond grateful that the next cell contained a face that was both familiar and friendly--and while he wasn’t exactly the _closest_ of friends with Yusuke just yet (unfortunately not going to the same school made it a bit more difficult to spend time together, not to mention how their personalities couldn’t be any more different), it was still comforting all the same to see the artist.

“Even in a jail cell, you still got your sketchbook?” Ryuji questioned, his expression both incredulous and amused. “Guess Akira just can’t picture you without it, not that I can blame the guy.”

Shadow Yusuke looked up from his sketchbook with the slightest hint of a smile. “I am grateful for it. However, it is a shame that I cannot use it to its full potential.”

Ryuji looked confused. “What d'you mean?”

“Everything in this palace is constructed from Akira's cognition, correct?”

“... Yeah…?”

“That in turn means that certain things are limited to the capabilities, or lack thereof, of Akira's cognition.”

Ryuji blinked, taking a moment to try and translate Shadow Yusuke’s words to something that made sense before it hit him.

“... Are you saying you can't draw ‘cuz Akira can't draw?”

“Technically speaking, it isn’t that I am unable to draw, but rather that Akira lacks the cognitive ability to imagine what I would draw when left with nothing to use as a source of inspiration.” Shadow Yusuke turned his sketchbook for Ryuji to see, the page filled with shaded lines that seemed to shift and change each time Ryuji blinked. “As you can see, though I can continue to sketch, the end result is unable to be viewed through anyone’s eyes but my own. As I said before, it really is a shame.”

“... Huh.” Ryuji scratched his head. “Well, guess that makes just about as much sense as anything else that has to do with all this cognitive stuff.”

“Though there is one drawing that has come out clearly,” Shadow Yusuke added, flipping the pages in his sketchbook before turning it once more for Ryuji to see.

Ryuji leaned closer to the bars, his brows furrowing as he looked at the drawing of a masked man in a billowing coat, blood-red gloved hands gripping a dagger as he stared forward with a confident smirk.

“I feel like I’ve seen him somewhere…,” Ryuji murmured absentmindedly, his brows furrowed in thought.

“Does the name ‘Joker’ sound familiar?” Shadow Yusuke prompted, causing Ryuji’s eyes to widen in recognition.

“No way! But… Akira never got a Persona, so why…?”

Shadow Yusuke set his sketchbook aside. “I think you already have an idea, do you not?”

Ryuji faltered, an uncertain expression on his face. Sure, he had some _guesses_ based on everything he’d seen and heard so far, but as far as Ryuji was concerned, none of this shit was making any sense.

He had a feeling that he was missing just one, crucial piece of the puzzle--and he had an even stronger feeling that he’d only find that piece once he reached the treasure.

Shadow Yusuke gave Ryuji a knowing smile. “It’s perfectly alright if you do not have all the answers just yet. All will be revealed to you in due time.”

“Yeah, yeah, everyone keeps telling me the same thing,” Ryuji replied with a sigh. “Still sucks not getting the full picture, though.”

“It is indeed frustrating, but your patience will pay off soon enough.”

Hoping that that was Shadow Yusuke’s way of telling him that he was close to the end, Ryuji reached out to take the card from outside his cell with renewed eagerness. “Lessee… ‘ _The Emperor_ ’, huh. You do got a kinda royal feel to ya.”

Shadow Yusuke chuckled. “I appreciate your kind words, just as I appreciate Akira’s generosity in associating such a card with someone like myself.”

“I’m guessing this card is like… what, being a leader ‘n’ stuff?”

“That is more or less correct, yes. The card represents authority and control, but it can also signify tyranny and rigidness as well--and while I would not consider myself to be a leader as Akira is, I suppose I can see bits of myself in both the positive and negative aspects of this card.” Shadow Yusuke’s eyes closed in thought. “The calm control that comes with ruling and organizing one’s path in life--and as for the negative aspect… well, I suppose the interpretation of having a father figure that takes control of your actions in order to render you powerless hits a bit close to home.”

Ryuji grimaced. “Forget hitting a bit close to home, that’s a fuckin’ home run right there, jeez.”

“Though that proves all the more just how much attention Akira pays to us all, does it not?” Shadow Yusuke smiled slightly. “It certainly could not be easy, taking in both the good and the bad of so many people and going through the trouble of associating each of us with a card that fits.”

Ryuji nodded in agreement. “Dude really doesn’t know how to half-ass anything, does he?”

“No, I suppose he doesn’t,” Shadow Yusuke responded with a soft chuckle.

**_I have to do this, as the leader of the Phantom Thieves._ **

Ryuji frowned as he heard Akira’s voice, a foreboding feeling washing over him even before the memory began to play in his mind.

* * *

_He could see through Akira’s eyes the group gathered in Akira’s bedroom--a group that Ryuji realized by now was the future Phantom Thieves: Akira, Ryuji, Morgana, Ann, Yusuke, and three other girls that he’d seen briefly in other memories._

_(Now if only he could understand how the hell Akira had_ **_memories_ ** _of the_ **_future_ ** _.)_

_“We need to talk about how to get out of this situation.”_

_Morgana’s voice captured Akira’s attention first, followed by the dark brown haired girl (Makoto?) and the long red haired girl (Futaba?) as they each spoke in turn--and though Ryuji could barely follow the situation with what little information he had, it was obvious what the bottom line here was._

_Akira was going to put himself in danger. For their team, and for the sake of taking down yet another shitty adult._

_Ryuji wanted to voice his objections, wanted to yell that it didn’t matter if it was all an act, having someone get purposely arrested and_ **_killed_ ** _was just so fucked up--_

_(How the hell wasn’t his future-counterpart saying anything about this? Why wasn’t he objecting to this horrible plan?)_

_\--but even if he could say anything, the determined nod that Akira gave his team as he agreed to their plan would have made any words worthless._

_Akira was their leader, after all. Who else could do this but him?_

_(But it wasn’t fair, hadn’t he suffered enough?)_

* * *

**_I’m no longer fit to be their leader. Even just thinking of shouldering all that responsibility again… I just can’t do it._ **

Ryuji ran a hand through his hair, blinking a few times to clear his vision and focus on Shadow Yusuke, who was watching him with a thoughtful gaze.

“You appear to be moving closer to the truth,” Shadow Yusuke commented.

“Then why’s it feel like I got more questions than answers?” Ryuji grumbled as he pocketed the card.

“The pursuit of knowledge is endless, and the pursuit of truth is often just the same: once one truth is revealed, a new mystery appears to take its place.”

Ryuji groaned. “Can’t I just get a straight answer ‘n’ be done?”

Shadow Yusuke chuckled. “Do you really believe our leader would have such a simple cognition?”

“Ain’t nothing simple ‘bout that guy,” Ryuji responded with a sigh. “I swear, he goes outta his way to make shit more complicated.”

“Perhaps, and perhaps there are mitigating circumstances regarding the complexity of his cognition.”

“Please don’t talk like that, I’ve already got a huge freakin’ headache as it is without having to translate what you’re saying into normal words.”

Shadow Yusuke’s lips quirked upward in amusement. “My apologies. What I meant to say was that there may be things beyond Akira’s control that are making your pursuit of truth more difficult. It isn’t entirely his fault.”

Ryuji hummed in thought. “... Yeah, I kinda got that feeling too, but I guess I won’t know nothing for sure ‘til I get to talk with Akira’s shadow himself.”

“I suppose you’d best be going, then.”

“Guess so, yeah.”

Ryuji rubbed the back of his head, hesitating for a moment before adding, “It, uh… was good seeing a familiar friendly face, even if you’re just a shadow. Thanks for the help.”

Shadow Yusuke’s expression softened slightly. “It was my pleasure. I wish you the best of luck.”

Ryuji smiled. “Thanks, man. Seeya.”

The shadow nodded and returned his attention back to his sketchbook, signaling the end of their conversation, and Ryuji in turn shifted his attention to the remainder of the hallway ahead of him--and the faint sight of the door at the end of the way.

_I’m almost there… just hold on a bit longer, Akira._

Ryuji turned away from the cell and began walking, knowing without even glancing back that both the cell and its shadow inhabitant was disappearing behind him.

_Really is a shame, though… that drawing of Joker was pretty damn cool._


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I want to preface this chapter with the reminder that I only know the bare minimum about tarot card stuff from what I've read online, so if anything is incorrect, I apologize;;

Ryuji was glad that the majority of the remaining people, though still more or less strangers, were a bit closer to his age than most of the previous people.

There were a few adults (what exactly was Akira doing with his life that he was close with a fortune teller, a drunken reporter, and a prosecutor??), and one elementary school kid ( _seriously_ Akira?), but save for one Kosei student, the rest of the people were all ones that he’d seen flashes of in Akira’s memories--future members of the Phantom Thieves.

(How was he supposed to keep a straight face when he saw these people in reality? How the hell had Akira managed to act like he was experiencing everything and meeting everyone for the first time?)

Talking with each of them continued to give him more insight into Akira’s thought process, the pieces gradually falling into place until finally, he approached a large, locked door with two young girls standing guard in front of it.

“It’s about time you arrived!” one of the girls shouted, her platinum blonde hair pulled up in a side bun and a baton smacking against her hand threateningly.

“We’ve been awaiting your arrival,” the other girl added in a softer tone as she toyed with the clipboard in her hands, her platinum blonde hair pulled back in a braid.

Ryuji glanced between the two warily. “Who the hell--wait….” His brows furrowed as he recalled one of the earlier memories he was shown. “Weren’t you two… with that creepy old guy with the big nose?”

“Show some respect!” the louder girl exclaimed, smacking her baton against the door behind her hard enough to make Ryuji jump. “That’s Master Igor you’re talking about!”

“Sorry, jeez!”

The calmer girl stepped forward. “My name is Justine, and this is my sister, Caroline.” Justine gestured to her twin before continuing. “We are the wardens in charge of monitoring the inmate’s rehabilitation, but….”

“But that no-good inmate had the nerve to refuse our master! He locked himself up in his own prison instead!”

Ryuji frowned, eyeing the door behind the twins. “... So Akira’s really in there, then?”

“That is correct,” Justine replied with a nod, her gaze dropping down to her clipboard. “It seems that you are the only one who can free him. Have you assembled all of the keys?”

Ryuji pulled the stack of twenty cards out from his pocket. “Yeah, got ‘em all here.” Eyeing the indentations in the door, he added, “Guess I’ve just gotta stick ‘em in the door?”

“Idiot! If it were that easy, anyone could do it!”

Ryuji grimaced at Caroline’s harsh comment and glared. “Then what the hell do I gotta do, huh?”

“Maybe pay attention for starters!” Caroline gestured to the door with her baton. “Or you would have realized that you _don’t_ have all the keys!”

“Huh? What d'you mean I don’t--” Ryuji paused, his brows furrowing as he counted each of the indentations. “... Son of a bitch, I’m missing two. How the hell…?”

“Caroline, do not tease the Chariot,” Justine said with the slightest hint of amusement, before turning to face Ryuji. “Do not worry. We have the last two keys that you seek.”

Ryuji let out a relieved sigh. “Good, ‘cuz I _really_ didn’t wanna have to backtrack after making it this far.”

Caroline huffed as she stepped forward, pulling out a card and shoving it at Ryuji, who warily took the card from her. “You’d better listen carefully, Chariot: this card is the ‘ _Strength_ ’ arcana--and no, before you ask, it’s not talking about physical strength.”

Ryuji closed his mouth. Not like he was about to ask that or anything.

“The ‘ _Strength_ ’ arcana represents fortitude and resilience--the kind that the inmate was _supposed_ to show in his rehabilitation.” Caroline’s face scrunched up in irritation. “He seems to be living up to the reverse, instead: a lack of conviction and confidence, stunting him and preventing him from moving forward.”

Ryuji frowned thoughtfully as he looked down at the card, nodding slowly as he added it to the stack in his other hand.

**_We won’t give up. No matter what we’re up against, we will win!_ **

* * *

_“I am the administrator born of the collective human unconscious… the god of control, Yaldabaoth.”_

_Ryuji couldn’t believe the sight that he was seeing through Akira’s eyes._

_How had they somehow gone from stealing treasures from palaces to fighting a_ **_god_ ** _?_

_Yet somehow, no one was freaking out--on the contrary, they were eager, their voices ringing out with strength and conviction as they spoke against the so-called god’s selfish ideas and prejudiced claims._

_It didn’t take a genius to figure out where that strength came from._

_Back straight, gaze sharp, standing in front of the Phantom Thieves--Akira’s leadership had obviously brought them this far, and would continue to carry them even farther, no matter what they were up against._

_Akira’s voice, so rarely heard but so powerful when spoken, summed up his entire team’s convictions in three simple words._

_“Let’s win this.”_

* * *

**_I can’t… I just can’t do this anymore…._ **

Ryuji’s frown deepened, but he didn’t bother wasting time asking any questions, instead turning his gaze over to Justine expectantly.

“Here is the final key.” Justine held out a card to Ryuji, who took it and looked down at it curiously.

“‘ _The World_ ’?”

Justine nodded. “This is the arcana assigned to the inmate. It signifies unity and completion--a fitting card for an inmate that completes his rehabilitation and overcomes his fate. However… as he has rejected his rehabilitation, he is left with no closure, and will not be able to meet our master’s expectations for him.”

Ryuji put the last card on top of the stack in his other hand, a frown on his face as he glanced between the twins. “... You two keep calling him an ‘inmate’ and talking about ‘rehabilitation’ and stuff like that, but… what the hell’s all that mean? Akira’s on probation, he’s not _actually_ in prison--right?”

“Hmph. Explaining would be a waste of our time--if you want answers, then ask the inmate himself.”

Ryuji was about to argue, when the sound of Akira’s voice ringing through his head interrupted his thoughts.

**_This is where I’m meant to be. Even when I go home… I know my true home will be waiting for me here._ **

* * *

_The feeling of peace and unity was immediately apparent as the memory played through Akira’s eyes: sitting in a van with all of the Phantom Thieves--all of his closest friends--smiling and laughing as the scenery passed them by._

_Akira’s gaze traveled over to each of his friends, one by one, as if trying to memorize every last inch of them._

_Makoto, driving the van and talking with Ann, who responded to something she said with a grin, the two girls giggling amongst themselves._

_Futaba, leaning over from the back seat to tease Yusuke, who was doing his best to ignore her--and failing, if the corners of his lips twitching were any indication--as he kept his gaze on his sketchbook._

_Haru, smiling and petting a purring Morgana on her lap while halfheartedly chiding Futaba for not sitting down properly while they were driving._

_And Ryuji…._

_He could feel Akira’s gaze softening as his own face came into Akira’s view, and the Ryuji from Akira’s memories seemed to notice Akira staring as he gave him a bright grin, bumping their shoulders together with unmistakable affection._

_Akira’s lips curled upward into a smile, and Ryuji could feel his heart breaking._

_He had a strong gut feeling that this was the last time Akira ever gave anyone such a carefree, genuine smile._

* * *

**_It’s over…. I can never get that time back. I know that, and yet… I can’t move on, it hurts too much…._ **

Ryuji hardly realized that his free hand had reached up to grip his shirt over his heart until the sound of Caroline’s scoff brought him back down to reality.

“... He was happy,” Ryuji murmured. “He was going home, but we were all with him, and he was happy.”

“Do you understand now, Chariot?” Justine asked.

“I… I think, but I just… I need to talk to Akira. I need to hear the truth from him.”

Caroline and Justine nodded and stepped aside in unison, allowing Ryuji access to the door behind them.

“You’d better not have wasted our time, Chariot.”

“Do your best, Chariot.”

With that, the twins faded away in a shimmer of blue light, and Ryuji watched in muted shock as the light merged together to form a blue butterfly.

“ _Please… save my Trickster. The world still needs him._ ”

Ryuji looked up at the butterfly, not fully understanding whose voice had spoken to him--it had sounded similar to the twins, yet different--but understanding the feelings behind the plea.

“Don’t worry. I ain’t leaving this place ‘til I knock some sense back into Akira.”

Apparently satisfied, the butterfly fluttered away, disappearing as it reached the ceiling and leaving Ryuji all by himself.

Ryuji was silent for a moment before letting out a long sigh, clapping himself on his cheeks, and nodding with a determined expression.

“Alright, c’mon Ryuji, you’re almost at the end--you can do this.”

Deciding to give his legs a bit of a break, he plopped himself down onto the floor in front of the door and spread all the cards out in front of him, crossing his arms across his chest in thought as he looked between the cards and the door.

“... ‘kay, so each of these cards goes in those slots on the door… and I guess they go in in the order I got them?”

Figuring that would be as good of a start as any, Ryuji made sure the cards were lined up in order before picking up the first one.

“The meanings are also supposed to be important….” Ryuji scratched his head. “Uh, this one was… something about beginnings, I think? That freaky looking guy also said something about being reckless or negligent or whatever, but… if it’s what I think, then the beginning thing fits better.”

Ryuji blinked as “ _The Fool_ ” disappeared from his hand, before reappearing on the door under the words “ _Le Mat_ ”.

“... Cool, guess I don’t gotta get up ‘n’ actually put the cards in the door myself.”

(If Akira was cutting him a break, Ryuji definitely appreciated it--he was beginning to feel exhausted despite not doing any fighting, and he resolved to never under any circumstances do an entire palace in one go ever again.)

Ryuji picked up his own card next. “‘kay, so ‘ _The Chariot_ ’... if I gotta pick, I’d say the lack of control fits him better right now.”

He stared at the card, waiting for something to happen, before a realization hit him--and with a flat look, he turned the card upside down before it finally disappeared from his hand, the card reappearing on the door under the words “ _Le Chariot_ ”.

“Oh c’mon, _seriously_? I gotta figure out which direction they’re supposed to be in too?”

Thankfully, the fortune teller Chihaya (bless her sweet soul, shadow or not) had taken the time to sit with him and excitedly explain each of the cards to him, including the ones he hadn’t gotten yet--so between that and his discussions with each of the associated people, he more or less understood each card’s meaning and direction despite his complaints.

_The things I do for Akira, I swear…._

Ryuji couldn’t help but crack a brief smile even through his griping.

_Who am I kidding, I’d do anything for Akira._

(Even spend his evening running through a palace, talking with friends and strangers, sorting through memories that weren’t his own, and messing around with tarot cards. No one could ever say that Ryuji wasn’t a loyal and dedicated friend, that’s for sure.)

“Okay, c’mon, focus. What’s the next card…?”

One by one, Ryuji went through the cards, each one appearing in its respective place on the door as Ryuji puzzled out the associations between them and what was keeping Akira trapped in his own prison, until there was only one card left in front of him.

“... And finally, the last one.” Ryuji picked up the final card and pushed himself up to his feet. “‘ _The World_ ’... Akira really must be important, huh, having something like ‘ _The World_ ’ representing him.”

Ryuji approached the door, running his fingers along the words above the final slot: _Le Monde_.

“... He had everything. He helped so many people, made so many friends, even made peace with going back home… but he lost it all. I still don’t get _how_ it happened, but… Akira, you’ve already lived through this year, haven’t you?”

Ryuji gently set the final card, reversed, into the slot on the door.

“You had your ending ripped away from you once, but I won’t let anyone take that from you again.”

Ryuji could barely wait for the door to open before he stormed through, ready to face whatever was going to get in between him and stealing Akira’s treasure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to include these in the chapter itself before realizing it might be a bit boring and tedious to read through, so for anyone who’s actually interested in reading the (probably inaccurate) bs I managed to come up with for the tarot cards with relation to Akira's situation here it is:
> 
> The Magician, _Le Bateleur_ : Reversed, Feeling the need to hide the truth  
> The Lovers, _L’Amoureux_ : Reversed, The inner conflict of whether hiding the truth was really the right thing to do  
> Death, _La Mort_ : Reversed, His reluctance to let go of the past that he lost  
> The Hierophant, _Le Pape_ : Upright, The loss of his rebellious spirit  
> The Moon, _La Lune_ : Reversed, The fear and anxiety preventing him from moving forward  
> The Hanged Man, _Le Pendu_ : Upright, Accepting that he will have to shoulder his burden alone  
> The Sun, _Le Soleil_ : Reversed, Being unable to find true joy in anything anymore  
> Temperance, _La Tempérance_ : Reversed, The lack of purpose brought about by his lost past  
> Justice, _La Justice_ : Reversed, Difficulty acknowledging and admitting to the reality of his situation  
> The Emperor, _L’Empereur_ : Reversed, The avoidance of accepting the position of leadership he once possessed  
> The Wheel of Fortune, _La Roue de Fortune_ : Reversed, The unfortunate fate weighing him date  
> The Devil, _Le Diable_ : Upright, The feeling of entrapment and powerlessness  
> The Star, _L’Etoile_ : Reversed, The loss of hope and the feeling of defeat  
> The High Priestess, _La Papesse_ : Reversed, The uncertainty that contradicted the actions he knew he had to take  
> Judgement, _Le Judgement_ : Reversed, Judging his past choices and actions too harshly, and blaming himself for something out of his control  
> The Hermit, _L’Hermite_ : Reversed, The desire to isolate himself and remain trapped in his own mental prison  
> The Tower, _La Maison Dieu_ : Upright, The drastic change in his life as he was forced to relive an entire year  
> The Empress, _L’Imperatrice_ : Reversed, Lacking the desire to make decisions for himself, and letting everyone else make decisions for him  
> Strength, _La Force_ : Reversed, The depression and lack of conviction making it harder and harder for him to try and move on with his life


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter after this actually an epilogue, so that technically makes this the last chapter of the fic! I'm honestly blown away by all the support I received--I was barely expecting it to get any attention at all, let alone over 2000 hits and close to 200 kudos. Thank you to everyone that read, kudo'd, commented, or even just popped in for a quick look, it means a lot to me! ;u; I'll have the epilogue up next week, so look forward to it! ^^

The room was dimly lit, the eerie silence that filled the empty space only broken by the faint sound of chains rattling.

Still, this didn’t deter Ryuji from striding deeper into the barren room, until he could finally make out a person’s silhouette--a person who was bound to the wall behind them with chains around their arms, legs, and chest.

The person raised their head, and Ryuji’s heart sunk as recognition set in.

“ _Akira!_ ”

Though he was in the Joker outfit that Shadow Yusuke had shown him, Ryuji still would have recognized him immediately: his hair, his eyes, the soft yet sad smile on his face… it was all so unmistakably _Akira_ , even if Ryuji knew this was just a shadow too.

Ryuji moved to rush towards him, intending on trying to pull him free, but Akira’s shadow stopped him with a shake of his head.

“Don’t. You’ll be seen as a threat if you try and force these chains off.”

Ryuji scowled, taking a step forward with a frustrated expression. “So what the hell am I supposed to do, then?! How can I help you!”

“You’ve already helped me by making it this far, Ryuji.”

Ryuji faltered. “... It ain’t enough, though. You’re still trapped.”

Shadow Akira closed his eyes. “You still have to steal my treasure in order to set me free.”

“So where’s your treasure, then?” A thought hit him, and he grimaced as he added, “Wait, don’t I gotta send a calling card too?”

Shadow Akira cracked a small smile. “That won’t be necessary. The real Akira is already fully aware of your presence, and of your intentions.”

“Oh… guess that’s true,” Ryuji replied, rubbing the back of his head. “So I can skip that part ‘n’ get straight to stealing the treasure?”

Shadow Akira reopened his eyes to glance at Ryuji. “You can, so long as you understand what you’re stealing.”

“... It’s everything holding you back.” Ryuji hesitated, taking a breath before adding, “All the stuff… from the year you’ve already lived through. … Right?”

Shadow Akira’s expression relaxed in a mixture of sorrow and relief. “That’s right.” He raised his head to meet Ryuji’s gaze straight on, his expression hardening. “I’ve been deceiving you all, running from my fate and clinging to a past that doesn’t exist anymore. I’ve lost my rebel’s spirit, and become a shell of the person I’d grown to be. I’ve used my knowledge of the future not to help, but to avoid as much responsibility as I could. I….” Shadow Akira shook his head slightly, his gaze falling once more. “I’m not the person you thought I was. I know I’ve ruined my chances of forming meaningful bonds with you and the rest of our team--I’ve seen all of you grow closer with one another, moving forward in your lives while I remained stuck in the past. All I can say is… I’m sorry.”

Ryuji frowned, remaining quiet as Akira’s shadow spoke. Silence filled the room once more after Akira’s shadow finished, and was only broken as Ryuji took a few steps forward, clearing the distance between himself and his best friend’s shadow.

Unable to touch the chains or any part of the shadow’s body covered in them, Ryuji settled for bringing his fist down on the top of Shadow Akira’s head, just hard enough to make him grimace.

“And people call _me_ the stupid one,” Ryuji grumbled, before grabbing Shadow Akira’s face in both his hands and forcing him to meet his eyes. “That stupid martyr attitude of yours really pisses me off sometimes, I swear. Did’ja really think we wouldn’t’ve helped you if you’d told us all this?” Ryuji straightened up and moved his hands once he was sure Shadow Akira wasn’t going to look away, one of Ryuji’s hands moving up to run through his hair in exasperation as he continued. “I mean shit, I know we prolly ain’t _exactly_ the same as the people you’ve got in your memory--you’ve been through all kinds’a shit with them that we’ve never even come _close_ to dealing with yet--but we ain’t _that_ different. Or what, did’ja just not trust us enough to think that we’d hear you out without chasing you off to some looney bin or something?”

“I… that’s not it, I just….” Shadow Akira faltered, before giving in with a quiet sigh. “... I’m sorry, you’re right. I was afraid that I’d lose you-- _all_ of you--if I said anything. I thought it would be okay if I just… stayed quiet and followed along with everything that happened, if I just let everything happen instead of fighting back against it….” He let out another quiet breath, his shoulders sagging in defeat. “I don’t know. I never thought things would get this bad.”

“But do you want things to change?”

Shadow Akira met Ryuji’s gaze. “... I do. The way things are going… this isn’t right. Things will end up even worse than before if nothing changes.”

“I ain’t talking about that.” Ryuji frowned, unsure of whether to feel angry or sympathetic as the shadow looked at him in confusion. “Not for the future, not for us, not for the world, not for whatever fate or god or _whatever_ the fuck is stringing you along--do _you_ want things to change? Do _you_ , Akira Kurusu, want to change who _you_ are, for _yourself_?”

Shadow Akira looked stunned for a moment--one long, sad moment where Ryuji realized that Akira had genuinely never even thought about trying to change to make _himself_ happy--before the shadow’s expression softened into a grateful smile.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Sit rotting away in your own palace, prolly,” Ryuji quipped with a grin, trying to ignore the light heat in his cheeks as Akira’s shadow continued to look at him with an expression of gratitude and something else--something that Ryuji was reluctant to acknowledge, not out of repulsion but merely out of a mixture of sympathy and embarrassment.

(Maybe someday, but not now, not while this whole mess was still so fresh in both of their minds.)

“I suppose that’s true,” Shadow Akira responded with a quiet chuckle.

Ryuji’s attention was pulled away from Akira’s shadow as he noticed a door out of the corner of his eye, and his brows furrowed in confusion as he looked over at it. “Was that there before?”

“No, but you can enter. You should be able to find the treasure inside.”

Ryuji perked up at the mention of the treasure, grinning--finally, he could get his hands on the treasure, set Akira free, and go home.

They were going to have one hell of a talk later, both in private and together with their team, but right now what was most important was just making sure that Akira would finally be okay.

Ryuji strode over to the door--noting with relief that it was a completely normal door with a normal handle--and opened it, his eyes widening in shock as he stepped inside.

“... Holy shit…. What the hell…?”

Surrounding him as far as the eye could see were masks hung on the walls: all essentially the same as the mask that Akira’s shadow was wearing, except each had a nuanced design difference.

_Yusuke would have a field day examining all of these,_ Ryuji thought idly as he walked into the room, his gaze curiously flitting back and forth between the walls on either side of him.

“ **_These are all of my masks_ ** ,” Akira’s voice spoke, and Ryuji wondered what exactly it said about him that he was hardly even startled by the sudden sound.

“How d’you have more than one mask?”

“ **_I… used to be what was known as the ‘Trickster’, or the 'Wild Card'--someone who had the ability to possess more than one Persona._ ** ”

Ryuji’s eyes widened. “Wait, wait, back up--you’re telling me all these masks are all your different Personas??”

“ **_That’s right._ ** ”

“But-- but there’s gotta be at least like… a hundred different masks here!”

“ **_Actually, there’s closer to two hundred,_ ** ” Akira’s voice responded with a hint of mirth.

“... Dude… that’s crazy, what the hell? How do you have so many Personas??”

Ryuji came to a stop as a brief memory flashed through his head: the Phantom Thieves surrounding a shadow with their guns pointed, Akira conversing with the shadow, the shadow entering his mask--

“So… so you just… convinced shadows to join you as Personas?” Ryuji questioned, a hand running through his hair. “That’s… pretty damn awesome, wow.”

Ryuji could have sworn he heard a faint chuckle in response, but the sound was gone as fast as it came, leaving him to silently continue to walk deeper into the room until he reached the glowing ball signifying a treasure.

He was cautious as he approached, watching in a mixture of surprise and relief as it turned tangible once he got close enough to take it.

“A key?” Ryuji examined the key curiously, before glancing behind him. “... I’m guessing that setting Akira free wasn’t just a figure of speech, then.”

He retraced his steps, making his way back into the room where Akira’s shadow was still chained up and approaching him with the key in hand.

“I can get you out with this, right?” he checked, just to make sure--the last thing he wanted was to jump the gun after getting this far and end up ruining things somehow.

Akira’s shadow nodded. “That is the key that locked me away, and the key that can set me free. The fact that it appeared for you means that there should be no more complications.”

Ryuji let out a relieved sigh. “Music to my ears,” he replied with the slightest hint of a smile. “Alright, now let’s get you outta these damn chains.”

He approached the shadow, finding the padlock hidden amongst the chains and inserting the key into the lock. As soon as he turned the key, the padlock let out an audible click and fell, dissolving into shadows with the chains following hardly a second later.

Ryuji straightened up and took a step back, giving Akira’s shadow room to stretch while staying close enough to catch him in case his legs gave out--shadow or not, being chained up for so long couldn’t have done anything good for him.

What Ryuji wasn’t expecting, however, was for Akira’s shadow to change form, and Ryuji took a few steps back warily as he stared up at--

“... Arsène...?”

“ **_Ah, so you remember my name,_ ** ” the Persona responded, his wings spreading to their full length behind him. “ **_It has been so long, I was unsure if my name had gone forgotten by even Akira himself._ ** ”

“I… I’m not sure how I knew your name,” Ryuji confessed sheepishly. “I think I heard it in one of Akira’s memories, but I never actually saw you, so… I dunno. Maybe it was just a lucky guess.”

“ **_Perhaps, or perhaps it was your own subconscious memory of times long past._ ** ”

“Y’think I got memories from that year Akira lived through?” Ryuji frowned, scratching his head. “I mean, I did kinda get a bit’a deja-vu or whatever when I first met Akira, and when I saw Ann ‘n’ Yusuke’s awakenings, but… I never really _remembered_ anything.”

“ **_Minds that have entered and accepted the cognitive world are different from most others. Do not rule out the possibility._ ** ”

“I guess that’s true….”

The sudden shaking of the ground beneath Ryuji’s feet forced his attention away from the Persona, and he cursed under his breath as he glanced around warily. “Shit, his palace is coming down, where the hell’s the--”

Arsène stepped aside, gesturing to a door on the wall where Akira’s shadow (or was that Arsène that whole time?) had been chained up.

“ **_This will return you to the real world._ ** ”

“... Did Akira seriously…?” Ryuji stared at the door for a moment before shaking his head and laughing. “Well, I ain’t gonna look a gift horse in the mouth.”

He rushed over to the door, stopping for a moment to glance back at Arsène with a grin. “Guessing I’ll be seeing you soon?”

“ **_I suspect it will not take much to trigger Akira’s rebellion, now that he has been given the opportunity to make peace with his regrets._ ** ” Arsène responded, his perpetual grin seeming to widen as he added, ” **_It has been far too long since I have had the chance to spread my wings. I look forward to it._ ** ”

Satisfied, Ryuji turned his attention back to the door, putting the key into the keyhole and unlocking it before pulling it open and stepping through.

It was with great relief that he felt the Metaverse melting away around him, the area shifting and changing until he found himself standing back in front of LeBlanc.

Letting out a long breath, Ryuji slumped back against the nearest wall, taking a second to let his body and mind rest before glancing down at the treasure in his hand.

“... It’s… a photo album?”

Part of Ryuji felt that he shouldn’t look--but honestly, he was pretty sure there was no way he could possibly invade Akira’s privacy more than he already had by going through his palace and seeing all the memories he was hiding.

Besides, he already had a feeling what he would find even before he flipped to the first page.

Hardly any of the pictures were actually good: most of them were blurry from obvious laughter while taking the pictures, or crammed full of too many people trying to squeeze into the frame, or featuring silly and unflattering faces of their entire team--but then there were some that Ryuji could just _feel_ the tenderness behind: candid shots of each of the Phantom Thieves smiling and laughing, shots of them dozing against one another in the same van from Akira’s last memory….

Ryuji had to close the photo album when he saw a picture of himself and Akira, with Akira’s lips on his cheek and a flustered yet pleased expression on his own face.

Moving a hand up to brush away the moisture that was gathering in his eyes against his will, he almost missed the cafe door swinging open to reveal Akira, trembling and staring at him with wide eyes and a tear-streaked face.

There was a moment of silence as they stared at one another before Akira finally stepped forward, and Ryuji met him halfway as the dark-haired boy’s arms moved to wrap around him in a shaky hug.

“... Thank you, Ryuji… I’m sorry, thank you….”

Ryuji shook his head slightly, a small smile on his face as he hugged Akira back.

“You don’t gotta apologize, and you don’t gotta thank me neither.”

_I’d do anything for you._


	7. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How did this fic jump by like 60 kudos in the span of a few days slkjdf god everyone in this fandom is incredible  
> Thank you guys so much for seeing this fic all the way through to the end!! This marks not only the first P5 multi-chapter fic that I've finished, but the first multi-chapter fic that I've _ever_ finished in my life (save for like... maybe one two-shot fic back in my early college days lmao), and I'm honestly amazed by all the support I've gotten for it. I know I said it last chapter, but I'll say it again: thank you so, _so_ much to everyone who read, kudo'd, commented, or even just popped in for a quick look; it's people like you guys that motivate me to keep writing!  
>  I hope you enjoy this epilogue/conclusion! ^^

Akira couldn’t figure out where things went wrong.

They’d taken down criminals both small and large, traversed all of Mementos, taken down a _god_ ….

He thought he’d beaten Yaldabaoth’s game--so then why, instead of waking up in his house the day after bidding his friends goodbye, did he jolt out of his sleep on the train to Tokyo on April 9th?

At first he hoped that maybe it was some kind of dream, but the longer the day lasted, the more he began to realize that this was really happening. He was really one year in the past, back when everything first began.

The last nail in the coffin was being pulled into the Velvet Room that night and seeing Caroline and Justine standing on either side of his cell, with Yaldabaoth disguised as Igor grinning at him.

“ _Welcome back, Trickster._ ”

Akira woke up sick to his stomach.

He couldn’t relive this year again--yes, he’d had good times and made great friends and great memories, but… having to look Kamoshida in the eye again knowing he was abusing his students; having to watch Madarame smile as Yusuke suffered in silence; having to watch Sojiro run off to tend to Futaba who feared the world and shut everyone out; knowing that Sae’s desires were slowly being warped and that Makoto could do nothing but watch her sister’s descent; knowing that people like Haru and Akechi were suffering at the hands of people like Okumura and Shido….

Not only that, but remembering all the things that were to come: the pain of awakening his Persona, the dangers of traversing each palace, all the close calls, getting _intentionally captured_ by the police--beaten and drugged and struggling to keep his thoughts straight enough because if this went wrong Akechi would _kill_ him, and even if he didn’t actually die he could still feel the gun pressed against his head and see Akechi’s cold expression as his finger pulled the trigger and--

Sojiro showing more disgust than concern as Akira emptied his stomach into the toilet only made Akira’s nausea worse.

* * *

Akira never went to Kamoshida’s palace.

He met with Ann and Ryuji, even walked with Ryuji to school just like he remembered doing originally, except….

He didn’t have the Meta-Nav.

It had been there on the first night, Akira remembered seeing it (or at least, he _thought_ he did… it was already getting difficult keeping his present-memories and his past-memories straight), but now that he was actively trying to search for it, it was nowhere to be found.

Akira tried not to let it bother him too much, just like he tried not to let the awkward unfamiliarity written all over Ryuji’s face break his heart too much.

It wasn’t Ryuji’s fault that he couldn’t remember everything that happened between them. He was the weird one for holding onto fond memories of someone who was essentially a stranger now.

Akira tried not to appear too relieved when Ryuji approached him outside the school gates at the end of the day, having spent the majority of the day trying to figure out how he was supposed to befriend someone when the app that had brought them together was nowhere to be found on his phone--but when Ryuji told him about the weird world that he’d gotten sucked into because _dude I just_ **_had_ ** _to tell someone please don’t think I’m crazy I_ **_swear_ ** _it happened_ , he couldn’t help feeling like another splinter had been shoved through his heart, even as he gave his friend--his _acquaintance_ \--a reassuring smile.

“I believe you.”

_Nothing bad will happen… I’m sure everything will be fine like this. He doesn’t need me, anyway. It’s fine, everything is fine…._

* * *

It seemed that not even going into the Metaverse through Ryuji’s app was enough to reawaken his Persona.

Akira had a sneaking suspicion as to why, but he refused to acknowledge it. Everything would be fine as long as he just kept playing along, and he didn’t need a Persona to hold his own anyway.

Thankfully, Ryuji hadn’t questioned Akira when he let slip about the model gun that he knew Ryuji had snuck in along with him, and had handed it over to him without question (and even _that_ made his heart hurt--Ryuji shouldn’t be this trusting, not when he was lying to his face and pretending to be ignorant about things that he knew all too well already--)

Shooting down the shadows that tried sneaking up on Ryuji felt almost disgustingly satisfying, as if he were taking out his frustrations towards his own vile inner self on the shadows representing Kamoshida’s vile inner self.

Akira knew that, as he was now, he would be satisfied with just being Ryuji and Morgana’s backup.

He hated it.

He hated what he was becoming, but he just couldn’t bring himself to stop.

_What's the point? I've never had any control over my life, so why bother fighting it?_

* * *

Akira was almost scared of how sharp Morgana could be.

Even when he kept his mouth shut, he’d sometimes see the cat glancing at him--not necessarily in suspicion, but he certainly seemed to be curious about _something_.

He didn’t want to know what. He didn’t think his heart could take it if anyone discovered everything that he was hiding.

Ryuji, however, seemed to be completely oblivious, and Akira wasn’t sure if that hurt more or less--a small part of him wanted Ryuji to question him, to be suspicious and stop treating him with such pure kindness and stop _trusting him_ so much because it _hurt_ , it hurt knowing that Ryuji saw him as a _friend_ when he was hiding so much horrible knowledge from him, from _all_ of them.

(And it hurt that Ryuji saw him as a _friend_ and nothing more, every little thoughtless touch--a slap to the shoulder, a nudge, even just him leaning _so close_ \--leaving behind a burning sensation that seemed to fade just in time for Ryuji to touch him again, repeating over and over and over.)

(It was hell, and he knew he could never escape.)

But just thinking about what would happen if he was honest with either of them--or worse, if they found out on their own….

As much as he wanted them to stop trusting him and being kind to him, as much as he knew he _deserved_ it, he also knew he wouldn’t be able to handle it.

He was too much of a coward.

So all he could do was continue to hide.

_I can’t let them find out… I have to just play along, everything will be fine if I just pretend…._

* * *

Akira would forever hate himself for not stopping Shiho from jumping.

He knew Ann would hate him too, if she ever found out.

There was no excuse for his lack of action save for his fear of standing out, of diverting from the script that he was trying so hard to follow despite everything already going wrong--he had no way of approaching Shiho without it being suspicious, had no way of approaching Ann without it being suspicious, had no way of assuring that Ann would still find her way into Kamoshida’s palace and have her Persona awakening and have the drive to take Kamoshida down--

_Am I really doing the right thing…? They deserve to know, but if they find out…._

As Akira stood off to the side, watching Ryuji and Ann and Morgana all heatedly discussing stealing Kamoshida’s treasure and getting him back for all the damage he’d done, he knew he’d made the right choice.

(Even if he really hadn’t, even if there had to have been some way, something that he could have done to help Shiho and still get this kind of outcome--)

_I can’t doubt myself--I’m doing the right thing._

His expression dimmed slightly as he took in the distance between himself and the people he held dearest, the few feet between them feeling like miles.

_As long as everything turns out alright for them in the end, then why should I feel guilty for keeping them in the dark?_

(It didn’t stop the guilt from haunting his dreams that night.)

* * *

Kamoshida’s treasure had been successfully stolen, and Kamoshida was repenting for his sins.

Just as Akira had hoped, everything was going as it should for his friends.

Though they really didn’t need to--honestly, he’d hardly done anything in the fight against Kamoshida’s shadow save for covering for a few of their missteps with some well-aimed shots--Ryuji, Ann, and Morgana were all kind enough to include him in their celebration.

He knew he didn’t deserve it, but he joined in anyway. He had to keep playing his part, after all.

After discussing the possibility of continuing to fight against corrupt adults like Kamoshida, they moved on to making themselves into an official team.

( _Of course, Akira can be an honorary thief as well--he’s shown a surprising amount of promise for someone who can’t use a Persona,_ Morgana commented, and the backhanded compliment stung more than Akira expected it to.)

They decided for the time being to not choose a leader, as neither Ryuji nor Ann were fit for the position, and they both refused to have a cat as their leader.

Akira wasn’t even considered for the position.

Part of him was glad.

_I’m no longer fit to be their leader. Even just thinking of shouldering all that responsibility again… I just can’t do it._

(The echoes of his teammates addressing him as their leader haunted his dreams, but he pushed it all aside in the morning. The days of him being a leader were long gone.)

* * *

_I can’t… I just can’t do this anymore…._

Things were going just as they were supposed to, which made it all the more difficult for Akira to accept.

He wasn’t needed.

Maybe he was never needed to begin with.

Everyone--Ryuji, Morgana, Ann, and now even Yusuke--had their own Persona, and were all growing stronger and more confident with each battle, their camaraderie growing both inside and outside the Metaverse.

Meanwhile Akira was left in the dust, his connections to the group weak at best--he knew about the Metaverse, he could go in with them and wield a gun, but… what else could he do? He wasn’t their leader, he couldn’t give them orders, and any time he was about to he had to bite his tongue and forcefully remind himself of his place.

It killed him inside, every time he watched all of his friends smiling and laughing with one another, fully conscious of the gap between them that seemed to be widening more and more with each passing day.

His friends were moving towards their future, while Akira was trapped, longing for the memories of a long-gone past.

_It’s over…. I can never get that time back. I know that, and yet… I can’t move on, it hurts too much…._

* * *

By the time Ryuji approached him, Akira had already come to accept that there would be no fixing his future, nor returning to the past that he’d lost.

That didn’t make it any easier to accept when the Meta-Nav confirmed his suspicions: that he, the Trickster, the person who was supposedly such an important part of the fate of the world… had a palace.

Of course, he’d fully expected Ryuji to get angry with him--he would have been more surprised if he hadn’t.

He also knew what was coming next, even if he dreaded it.

“I’m going in.”

Never had three words terrified Akira more.

He knew he already lost everything, he knew that there was no point in clinging to the weak bonds connecting him to the rest of the Phantom Thieves, but the thought of someone seeing everything that he’d managed to hide for almost two months now… it made him sick to his stomach.

Especially Ryuji. Especially knowing what he used to have with him, what he would no doubt end up discovering in some way or another (because god knows Ryuji was too important to him for him to _not_ have some kind of cognitive form in his palace)--there was no way that Ryuji would ever look at him the same way again.

The familiar feeling of defeated acceptance washed over him as he gave in with just a bit more prodding, having long since lost the will to put up a fight. At least Ryuji agreed to go in by himself; having only one person exposed to the entirety of his deceit was better than everyone seeing what a disgusting person he was inside.

Even if Ryuji would probably end up telling his teammates anyway.

Akira watched Ryuji go, listening to each step he took until he heard the front door opening and closing--and then he braced himself.

One minute went by. Two minutes. Five minutes.

Akira realized, belatedly, that he had no idea how to tell whether or not Ryuji was inside his palace--as far as he could remember, anyone whose palace they’d entered hadn’t even realized that there was anyone inside their cognition. Even someone like Shido, who knew all about the cognitive world, didn’t seem to have any knowledge of the thieves sneaking into his palace; nor did Futaba, despite knowing that she’d asked the Phantom Thieves to change her heart.

What would a change of heart feel like? Futaba had changed for the better, though it wasn’t exactly a miracle cure--would it be the same for him? Would this change who he was as a person, or just put him on the path to feeling like his old self?

… What did his “old self” feel like?

He vaguely remembered different things: having charm, wit, confidence, poise, charisma….

Was that really him, though? It felt like he was thinking about a completely different person.

Needing something to keep himself occupied, Akira turned his attention back to making lockpicks, his hands moving on muscle memory and his thoughts quieting as he fell into a mindless daze.

It was around when the sun began to set, dyeing his room a warm shade of orange, that Akira felt a jolt run through his body, his hands dropping his tools in favor of reaching up to grip his head.

_What’s…?_

Before he could even have the chance to try and figure out what had happened, the pain was gone, and in its stead was a feeling of… Akira didn’t even know how to describe it, other than _freedom_ , so similar to the faint memory of first awakening his Persona that it almost hurt to think about.

He knew Ryuji succeeded. Without anyone needing to tell him, he just _knew_.

Hardly even aware of the tears rolling down his face, Akira shakily rose to his feet and rushed downstairs, stumbling slightly in his haste but refusing to stop.

He had to see Ryuji. He had to make sure he made it out okay. What if he’d been hurt, what if he hadn’t managed to find an exit, what if--

Akira came to a halt as soon as he threw the door to the cafe open, his eyes widening as he caught sight of Ryuji.

Ryuji, who was completely unharmed.

Ryuji, who had tears in his eyes and a sympathetic, understanding expression on his face.

Ryuji, who was clearing the distance between them in step with Akira himself, the two moving almost in unison until Akira found his arms wrapping around him, relief and guilt warring in his mind as he let out a quiet sob.

“... Thank you, Ryuji… I’m sorry, thank you….”

He could feel Ryuji’s arms wrapping around him in return, pulling him closer instead of pushing him away like he had every right to after seeing everything Akira was hiding--after seeing all the horrible, disgusting, ugly parts of his heart, it was a wonder how Ryuji could even stand to be near him at all.

“You don’t gotta apologize, and you don’t gotta thank me neither.”

_But I do_ , he wanted to reply, except just this once, he wanted to feel like it was alright to accept Ryuji’s kindness and support without any guilt attached.

Instead, Akira merely nodded, letting himself soak in everything Ryuji was offering with just his hug and his kind words.

Maybe… maybe things wouldn’t be as bad as he feared. Maybe things would be alright after all.

* * *

Ryuji was the first to reluctantly pull away after another minute, gesturing towards the empty cafe with a weak smile.

“Mind if we head inside?”

“Oh… oh, yeah,” Akira replied, reaching up to take off his glasses and moving an arm to quickly dry his tears before heading over to the cafe and holding the door open. “Go ahead and sit down, I’ll make you something to eat.”

“That sounds great, I’m starved.” Ryuji’s smile widened into a more genuine grin as he made a beeline for one of the bar stools and plopped himself down with a relieved sigh.

Akira laughed softly as he watched Ryuji, entering the cafe and closing the door behind him before making his way behind the bar. “Do you want something to drink too?”

“Some soda would be great if you got some.”

Akira moved over to the refrigerator and pulled out a can of soda before tossing it to Ryuji, who caught it with a grin.

“Thanks man.”

“No problem.”

For a little while, the only sounds that filled the cafe were that of Akira working the stove, and Ryuji taking sips of his drink--yet despite everything that happened, or perhaps because of it, both of them were reluctant to break the quiet serenity of the moment.

Ryuji could tell just from looking into Akira’s eyes that he was already beginning to have his change of heart, and it left him feeling a sense of satisfaction and relief.

Akira could tell just from looking at Ryuji’s smile that his promise that he could never hate Akira had held true, and it left him feeling a warmth that he’d thought he’d never feel again.

However, the peaceful moment could only last for so long: once the curry finished cooking, and Akira returned to Ryuji’s side at the bar with two plates in hand, they knew it was time to talk.

(Or at least, time to talk after Ryuji finished inhaling his plate--he wasn’t about to have a serious conversation on an empty stomach, especially not after taking on a palace by himself in one day.)

Unsure of where exactly to start--Ryuji didn’t exactly have the heart to yell at Akira for bottling everything up and lying to them, not after seeing him cry--Ryuji figured the easiest icebreaker would be handing over the photo album that he’d brought back with him.

“Here. This, uh… this was your treasure.” Glancing away guiltily, he added, “I hope you don’t mind that I snuck a peak.”

Akira stared at the photo album for a moment before gingerly reaching out to take it, knowing exactly what it was even before he flipped to the first page. The pictures quickly began to blur as tears clouded his vision, yet he continued to go through the album page by page, a soft smile on his face.

“Everyone put together this photo album for me, as a parting gift,” Akira explained, his voice quiet as he spoke around the lump in his throat. “We added to it as they drove me back home. It was the strangest feeling--I was sad to leave, yet I felt so happy, so _content_ and _at peace_ just being together with everyone.” He laughed weakly. “I’d like to say I’m surprised that this was my treasure, but… I knew it all along. The memories that were supposed to give me the strength to move forward became the very thing holding me back…. It’s sad, really.”

“You finally got past all the hard shit ‘n’ made a bunch of good memories with all the people you care about, only for it all to get wiped away--I think anyone would’ve had a hard time moving on after something like that.”

Akira reached up to dry his eyes before giving Ryuji a soft smile. “Thank you, I appreciate that. I… honestly, I wasn’t sure how you would end up reacting to everything, but I wasn’t expecting anything as understanding as this.”

Ryuji looked slightly embarrassed as he shrugged. “It ain’t like I’m not pissed off about you keeping all that shit from us--’cuz I am--but I get why you did, and considering the circumstances I can’t say I blame you for being nervous to say anything. I mean hell, if I hadn’t seen all those memories myself, even I’d have a hard time believing something like this.”

Akira’s smile dimmed. “I really am sorry. I just… I don’t even know. It was like I was just… falling deeper and deeper into all this negativity and self-loathing, and I couldn’t pull myself out of it. I convinced myself that I shouldn’t tell any of you--that I _couldn’t_ tell any of you--and I distanced myself.” His gaze fell as a quiet, humorless laugh slipped out. “And now it’s probably too late. I’ve lost my chance--two months that I could have spent reforming the bonds that I lost are completely gone.”

“Hey, look at me.” Ryuji put his hands on Akira’s shoulders, waiting for him to meet his gaze before continuing. “It ain’t ever too late for nothing, you hear? Fine, maybe you lost out on two months, _whatever_ \--that don’t mean you can’t make up for lost time!” With a slight frown, he added, “The only thing is, you gotta be _honest_ , alright? No more hiding shit from everyone and suffering on your own. Got it?”

Akira let out a soft sigh before smiling weakly. “... I’ll try. It’s… not going to be easy, but I’ll try, I promise.”

Ryuji smiled and gave Akira’s shoulders a pat before straightening up. “Good. So how about we start by filling in the rest of the team on everything?”

Akira faltered, nervousness flickering across his expression. “I… I promise I’ll tell them, but… I can’t do it right now. This isn’t an instant thing, Ryuji; it’s going to take time.”

Ryuji sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I know, I know…. Sorry. How ‘bout this: when you’re ready, we’ll tell them together. That sound better?”

“Much,” Akira replied with a relieved breath and a small, grateful smile. “Thank you.”

Ryuji returned Akira’s smile with a grin of his own.

“No problem, man. That’s what I’m here for.”

* * *

It took a few days before Akira was ready to face anyone, the change of heart still gradually setting in--but once he finally felt some of his old confidence returning, he knew there was just one step left before he would be fully ready to reveal the truth to his friends.

Entering the Metaverse without his regrets weighing him down felt… Akira didn’t even know how to describe it--invigorating? Exciting? He felt so free, adrenaline pumping through him in a way he’d thought wasn’t even possible anymore.

All it took was a shadow appearing, and the familiar weight of a mask found its way onto Akira’s face.

As his other teammates watched in a mixture of shock and awe, Akira could see Ryuji’s proud grin out of the corner of his eye as he ripped his mask off, blue flames enveloping him as a familiar voice spoke into his mind.

“ ** _Do you accept my power once more?_** ”

“Yes… I’m done running, and I’m done hiding. _Come, Arsène!_ ”

As the demonic Persona took form behind him, a feeling of peace washed over him--he finally felt whole again, with the spirit of his rebellion by his side.

Akira knew that going forward, things would not be easy--he would have to sit with Morgana, and Ann, and Yusuke, explaining everything that happened to him; everything that he knew, everything that he didn’t do, everything that held him back… but standing here, with Arsène at his back and Ryuji at his side, his other teammates joining into the fray to help….

Akira couldn’t help the spark of optimistic hope that came to life inside of him as he realized that everything really would be alright.

Even if his friends got angry with him, yelled at him for hiding and making poor choices… in the end they would still be there to hold their hands out to him like they had in the past, helping him back onto his feet.

Perhaps this time, with their support, he would be able to break free of his fate once and for all.


End file.
